"My mind never stops speaking, in like, ever. In fact when I was a little boy, my mom used to say there was never a word I met that I didn't like."

See: Dan Humphrey and I are connected in that way!
Life is getting better.
Spent this past weekend with my grandpa
Which had it's fun moments: Just being around him and going out to dinner.
I love hanging out with my grandpa, but I missed hanging with people my own age.
I didn't like going to church.
All the old people are so serious about it.
The lights came on and literally they looked like God had done it.
It was so crazy.

Anyway.
I actually had a pretty decent day yesterday:
Had pizza with Ry, Mom & Dad and actually had fun.
My dad clicked OnDemand for movies and saw Fiddler On The Roof
And my dad was like "Rob, it's your movie!"
I cracked up, because it was my first musical and Topol is crazy!
=)

Life is getting better
Felony Melonie is back in my life.
She broke up with the jerk and now she wants to hang!
Yay, making up for lost time!
I missed her alot during senior year.
She was always busy with the jerk
Well, now I'm spending Halloween with her!
=)

Just bought the new Click Five CD.
It totally rocks: Mix of pop and rock.
Gotta love it.
They have such catchy tunes.
And they have a new lead singer, who rocks.
So yeah.
I shall end the blog entry in song [as usual!]:

It's been a long long time since everything was cool
I shoulda seen it coming but i guess i'm not the only fool
there's something growin on the outside
too much missin on the inside
should i waste my time and let you lead me on and on
and on and on?

"waiting for the day when i'm complete
without you i'm
doing what i can to let you be
making sure there's nothing showing on the outside
something's dying on the inside
i'm still broken but i'm free
i'll see you on the flipside

i've got a bruised up heart
but i'm still hanging out
i should take it easy but i'm still gonna get around
there's something growing on the outside
too much missing on the inside
should i waste more time when everything is done
and done and overdone"

---FlipSide by The Click Five

"Someday I'll wish upon a star. And wake up where the clouds are far behind me. Where troubles melt like lemon drops."

I'm holding on by a thread.
With my mother constantly telling me to use EHarmony and all those online dating sites.
Plus my freaking work load sucking majorly: Sick of working 2:30pm-11pm!
I'm just sick of the complete boredom my life has become.
I wanna go to school!
I wanna write a god damn essay! [I'd kill to write an essay!]
Hell, I'd even go to math class and pay attention!

My dad hasn't really been aiming at me recently :knock on wood:
Which is pretty great.
But my mother keeps complaining how I don't have a girlfriend.
She keeps telling I need to go on EHarmony or Match.com
For christsake, I'm 19, not 30!
For godsake, let me live my life.
It's crazy to think that my mother is saying this.
I told my friends from Acme, they were literally like "What the fuck!"
It's crazzzy.

Ugh. Ugh.
Sometimes I find myself singing "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" to myself.
Dorothy longed to escape the world she lived in.
I have to agree with that shoe-stealing farm girl who was raised in a barn [Yay, Wicked quotes!]
I need to "fly high above the clouds" to "a land I heard of once in a lullaby".

Or I find myself singing "Defying Gravity" to myself.
I find that inpower that Elphaba finds coming out sometimes.
To defy the expectations that people hold for me.
"Through accepting limits" and "Through playing someone else's game."
I'm searching for as Aqualung puts it: "Something to believe in."

Finding "Something to believe in" by trying to "Defying Gravity" and fly "Somewhere Over The Rainbow."

Someday. Hopefully.
I'll do all of that.
But for now, I'm stuck.
Dreaming of all of that.

"Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then oh why can't I?"

Exactly, why can't I?
---------------------------

"Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true"
----Somewhere Over The Rainbow, The Wizard of Oz

"We stumble into our lives
Reach for a hand to hold
Any wonder we need to find
A certain something certain

Turn out the light
And what are you left with
Open up my hands
And find out they're empty
Press my face to the ground
I've got to find a reason
Just scratching around
For something to believe in"
-----Something To Believe In", Aqualung

"Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes: and leap!

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you can't pull me down!"
----Defying Gravity, Wicked: The Musical